Thursday, August 30, 2012

Dear America: It's Time to GROW UP

*had to do some digging to find out who Cristy Cardinal is. Cardinal works at HAVEN in Michigan, I think. This quote was picked up by The Nation, August 21st. Article here. Cardinal - we love your quote!*

Misogyny in this country is staring straight at us. Looking us in the eyes and slapping us across the face. It doesn't care there's an audience. It doesn't care that generations of women who have fought for reproductive freedom have just watched. It doesn't care that this 13 year old was raped by her step-father and is now pregnant. The misogyny in our country is THAT blatant. THAT rampant. That disgusting.

When you're slapped so hard, with such force, it's shocking. The magnitude of disregard for women is strong enough that I feel stung every time I read. Every time I turn on the TV. There's always a new slant. A new way to get us on our knees.

But misogyny forgets that we are strong. Misogyny thinks of himself with such ferocity, that it doesn't notice the rumbling in the once quiet audience. Women are starting to speak out.

Maybe they began to feel safer to do so after Obama promised women at the national BlogHer conference that he would not "give ground" on abortion. Maybe quiet women are realizing just how loud the hate is.

Whatever has prompted it, women are using their voices.

I read a beautifully written post here from a woman who had been raped at 17. The blogger shared this private information with her community, and was shaking in her boots doing it.

Another blogger bravely wrote her abortion story here.

I'm in awe of women being prompted to talk about their experiences. And I know our abortioneer community is grateful. Not to mention many other American women.

Women have the right to be outraged. At least one in three of us will have an abortion. That's a lot of us. So, lots of women should be outraged, really.

Women blogging on abortion is a good thing. It's a terrible thing that all the insensitive and flat-out-jaw-droppingly-stupid things politicians have been saying has occurred. For some, it's like being raped all over again.

No matter how you put it, all this hate being spewed is a violation. It crosses the line so far that you can't even SEE that line anymore.

That is jarring. And it's making some of us talk. But they're so scared. So worried about being judged. And they're worried because we live in a society that shuts women up.

This society makes us think we can't use our voice, lest we are shunned and bad and wrong and selfish or a whore or had it coming to us. Or worse: that our bodies can shut off what we had coming to us.

Our society needs to change.

Our society needs to grow the fuck up and starting showing its humanity.


  1. Hey thanks! I'm Cristy Cardinal, and I *do* work at a place called HAVEN. HAVEN is a domestic violence/sexual assault service organization, and I am the Program Director of Prevention Education. I am also a blogger at UpRoot, a feminist blog related to the work I do. Anyway, thanks for the shout out, y'all do great work!

    1. Cristy,
      Welcome! Thanks so much for stopping by! We're grateful to have you here. Your quote rocked and we LOVED it!

      We're also excited about UpRoot. :-) Yay for your blog.

      Thanks for all your support on abortiony things, especially related to domestic violence/sexual assault.

  2. Thank you so much for this. I agree completely.

    1. Crystal,
      You are so very welcome. :)

      Thank you for stopping by!

  3. This is an excellent piece. Thank you for writing it.

    I think it is time women stopped being polite with misogynists! We should be outraged.

    I'm sharing it with our viewers on Twitter (@asapasia)

    1. Thank you, AS AP. Thank YOU for the work you're doing in Asia to keep abortion safe. We're very happy you've stopped by here.

      Yes, it *is* time polite discourse on misogyny ends. Thank you for listening/reading the rant about it. ;)


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