My Christmas Gift to You

Merry Christmas, happy Chanukah, happy Kwanzaa, happy Yule, merry Generic December Holiday. My gift to you, dear pro-choice, pro-abortion readers, is an old school mix tape playlist. Some of the songs are ones I listen to as I drive to work, preparing to walk through the protesters. Others are ones I listen to when I get into a funk wondering if anyone thinks about Dr. Tiller anymore. And some of them are ones I jam out to when I'm feeling good because abortion is safe and legal and my fellow Abortioneers around the world just rock. Happy listening!

2009 Abortioneers Mix

Soulja Boy, Turn My Swag On--OK, so he's not terribly feminist. But when we wake up in the morning knowing that we have a long day ahead of us, and especially when we're psyching ourselves up to walk through protesters, we sure as hell "hop up out the bed, turn [our] swag on, take a look in the mirror, say 'What's up?"

Pat Benatar, Invincible--When we wonder if we're really making a difference, if we should really keep fighting, Pat says YES:

What are we waiting for ?

Won't anybody help us ? What are we waiting for ? We can't afford to be innocent Stand up and face the enemy. It's a do or die situation - we will be invincible. This shattered dream you cannot justify. We're gonna scream until we're satisfied. What are we running for ? We've got the right to be angry

Tracy Chapman, Talkin' 'Bout a Revolution--Sometimes, it "sounds like a whisper," but it's there and that's why we do what we do.

Big Country, In a Big Country--I never thought much of this song until I listened to the lyrics:

So take that look out of here, it doesn't fit you.

Because it's happened doesn't mean you've been discarded

Pull your head off the floor, come up screaming

Cry out for everything you ever might have wanted.

And now, it's an anthem for we determined, stubborn activists.

Ani Difranco, Hello, Birmingham--I am a firm believer that you can never feel weak when Ani's voice and lyrics are behind you. She remembered Dr. Tiller before he was even gone, and she reminds me of all the other heroes we lost before I was even an Abortioneer

Kanye West, Stronger--I've been working in abortion for longer than I ever planned on, and I have no plans to stop. The work we do does make us stronger, and every patient I see is stronger than she ever believed she was.

Wilson Phillips, Hold On--Throwback ca. 1990 songs are instant pick-me-ups, especially when Carnie, Wendy, and Chynna are reminding me to keep on keepin' on.

Ani Difranco, Lost Woman Song--Thank you, Ani, for speaking up and speaking out, and for reminding me what it's like for a patient.

Beth Orton, Ooh Child-- It's a remake, but isn't it more comforting to hear Beth tell you that "things are gonna get easier"? She says it like she means it.

Jay-Z, Dirt Off your Shoulder-- They say you're an evil, baby-kiling monster? Brush that dirt off your shoulder! Abortioneers are pimps, too, you know.

Talk, Talk, It's My Life--It's my life and it's my choice.

Martina McBride, This One's for the Girls--She's never been my absolute favorite singer, but she's the only one who ties us all together with song that's also great for belting out in the car.

Journey, Don't Stop Believin'--This is the consummate last track because it just makes you feel good, and sometimes, we just need to feel good, am I right?

All I Want for Christmas Is

the ability to exercise my legal right to choose what happens to my body - not some old white men who will never know what it means to have an unexpected, unintended pregnancy. And yes, I include the crazy antis with nothing better to do with their time than harass women, who probably read this blog at 3am in their bathrobes.

Luckily, it looks like the particularly awful anti-abortion language (attempt to take away basically any insurance coverage) will not be in the final health care reform bill. Although, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I think they just replaced it with the same crap that basically defends the Hyde Amendment. I find it particularly funny that Republicans/conservatives call themselves small-government and claim that they don't want the government in their affairs. This is OK? Interfering in someone's ability to make their own health care choices is OK? It seems pretty Big Brother to me. Hypocrisy really pisses me off. But I guess it's OK when you're forcing your moral code onto everyone else.

How about this: Why don't you spend more time worrying about getting us out of the economic dump we're in right now and less time worrying about my body and what I do with it? As an adult, I think I can handle these affairs on my own. Thanks.

Since it doesn't look like women are going to get any help soon, and we all know choice means nothing unless you have the ability to exercise it, it looks like it's in our hands to help each other out. By us I mean, the abortioneers, clinic staff and volunteers, fellow pro-choice/pro-abortion bloggers, abortion fund workers, and all of you out their on the internet. In the coming new year, let's all do what we can to support each other. That might mean volunteering as a clinic escort, donating to a local abortion fund (you know how I like to plug for the funds), volunteer at a local clinic/Planned Parenthood with advocacy work, etc. - whatever you can do. Let's show that there are a lot of people out there in this country who support choice in all its forms.

In other news, Scott Roeder was denied the necessity defense for his trial. Some good news.

A written response to your ignorance:

In my family everything is a political debate, EVERYTHING. Very few of us agree on things like welfare, health care, elected officials, or abortion. I try to avoid these debates, they irritate me, people become angry or emotional and nobody really actively listens to each other so they are pointless as far as I'm concerned. When alcohol is involved they are usually more than pointless, more like ridiculously unproductive, sort of like taking steps backwards because everyone just become more strongly entrenched in their own opinion and NOTHING is going to challenge it no matter how incoherent that person's logic may be.

The other day one of my very polite, very sweet, non-debating male cousins used the "N" word. He's a cute 20 year old white boy from the south raised in a relatively liberal family. I love him, really he is one of the most enjoyable people in my family. I responded by telling him I didn't think it was appropriate for him to use that word. He said he just didn't get that. We didn't get deep in it but I told him that the use of that word to degrade black people is not some ancient part of history but people who were around when white people used that word as a form of verbal terror are still alive and kicking, and some aren't even that old. He didn't really respond, and I hope I gave him something to think about.

So, what does this have to do with abortion? For kicks I then asked him his opinions on abortion. I really had no idea what he would say. He says "well if a girl is dumb enough to get pregnant she should have to bear the responsibility of her actions." Not a surprising answer. I let him continue before I responded. He continued talking about these dumb girls who go around fucking every guy in town. He rambled about this and then went on a tirade about stupid girls who try to sue their boyfriends for money for their abortions. At this point I said, "dude, that does not happen." He said "I know girls that have tried that" and insisted that it does.

I told him I worked in abortion care for 4 years, it does NOT happen and if these "stupid girls" threaten to sue their idiot boyfriends, and their boyfriends believe its possible it sounds like they're the dumb one in the situation. He actually agreed once he realized it really doesn't happen. I mean, hello it would take nearly the whole pregnancy to get the case in court, not to mention she would lose. I remember a woman who had to wait until her second trimester to get an abortion, because she was 2 months away from 18 and she went to get a judicial bypass but the judge said since she already had a child she would probably regret it. So, she stayed pregnant for another 2 months until her 18th birthday. The bottom line is the American court system is not going to make men pay for abortions, the same courts can't get most men to pay child support and when they do it takes years to win that battle. Abortions are pretty time-sensitive.

I then followed up and said, what about someone whose been raped or molested? His response was, "yeah, well they should get an abortion if they want it." I dropped it at this point because I didn't want to debate, and it was clear that women's health and sexuality is just too complex for some people's ignorance. I can think of 1001 reasons why that one individual should be able to get her abortion, in fact daughter of wands listed 51 of those reasons in a blog several months ago. It's not productive to judge which individuals have the right combinations of reasons that make an abortion OK. I try to think of the kind of ignorance my cousin expressed as just that, pure ignorance; he does not have enough information or life experience to understand the complexities involved in women's health and reproduction. I wish that people could accept that they don't have to get it, they just need to be willing to let people live and make their own choices without judgment or questions. Of course, to give my cousin credit, I asked for his opinion, he did not pass judgement on someone else, but his opinion made it clear he has a judgment of young women who face unintended pregnancies.

Abortion=Empowerment=Information

Many women I know and respect immensely too would describe themselves as pro-choice but have issues with late-term abortion. The other day I spoke to another cousin of mine who is a young mom. We discussed late-term abortions and I told her, "you know if a woman is willing to go through having a late-term abortion she obviously needs it, and doesn't need a child regardless of the circumstances." She agreed, no questions asked. I was not really surprised, but my cousin would not identify herself as a feminist nor is she an activist or highly educated. However, she gets it because she is a young woman who has struggled with her own choice to be a mom. It made me question why so many pro-choice, feminist, activist people can't just get that it's an individual woman's decision, no questions asked, no matter what the circumstance.

Ways To Not Understand "Choice," or Patriots don't get pregnant

A 'C'? A 'C'? I got a 'C' on my coathanger sculpture? How could anyone get a 'C' in coathanger sculpture?


(who doesn't like a little humorous misapplication of a classic cartoon line?)


I can never tell if it's more frustrating or funny to realize I'm talking to someone who thinks pro-choicers support coerced abortion. It happens about as often as I venture into anti world -- which means, depending on how patient/masochistic I'm feeling. The thing that seems obvious to me is, "chosen" is like the opposite of "coerced," so you'd think pro-choice might suggest...anti-coercion.

The questions (they are usually questions, though I'm not sure if they're earnest or intended as a-ha! traps) are things like "What about that woman whose husband tricked her into taking the abortion pill" or "What about the woman whose parents threw her in the trunk of the car and drove her to an abortion clinic" or "What about the woman who was told by an evil genie that she had to either get an abortion or be sold into a harem on the lost island empire of Atlantis". #1 and #2 are specific examples of questions I've been asked, and they refer to actual events that have occurred. #1 and #2 are also called 'assault' and are punishable by prison time.

The other main twisting of "choice" that I hear a lot always feels like a punch in the gut, and I do hear this one a lot because our culture is full of slut-shaming, not just in anti world. People who think they're cute pipe up with this semantic tour-de-force that goes something like, "I believe in a woman's right to choose -- she could've CHOSEN not to spread her legs!" Ah, clever. The idea being, if you're dumb enough to CHOOSE to have sex, and then get pregnant from it, you fucked up and deserve to stay pregnant. I mean, we don't let speeding drivers seek treatment for their broken limbs, do we? Fifty-five means fifty-five! So if a woman finds herself pregnant in a situation where she can't stay pregnant, even though she knew from the get-go that getting pregnant would really suck, then she's an idiot and pretty much earned what she gets, which is to take her life into her hands, nearly kick the bucket, be refused emergency care from her own doctor, be told she's crazy by another doctor and also lose her job.

Say what? Well, you should read this: Military Abortion Ban: Female Soldiers Not Protected by Constitution They Defend.

“You hear these legends of coat-hanger abortions,” a 26-year-old former Marine sergeant told me recently, “but there are no coat hangers in Iraq. I looked.”

Synopsis, though I hope you'll just go read the article: active-duty military who become pregnant are discriminated against and those who seek abortions get it even worse. So they're trapped, and might do the next logical thing: the Russian roulette of DIY. (You can also see this sergeant interviewed in the documentary The Coat Hanger Project.)

And right on the heels of that article comes word of a recent policy on the ground in northern Iraq that pretty much codifies what's been going on all along: forced unsafe abortion for female servicemembers. U.S. personnel in Iraq could face court-martial for getting pregnant:

The policy, which went into effect Nov. 4, makes it possible to face punishment, including a court-martial and jail time, for becoming pregnant or impregnating a servicemember, according to the wording of the policy and confirmations from Army officials. ... The policy also applies to married couples who are at war together.

To recap, your beloved Department of Defense:
(1) forbids medical personnel to provide abortion care except in cases of rape or life endangerment;
(2) refuses to cover the cost of abortion care except in cases of life endangerment only;
(3) by its very nature stations its personnel in places it has utterly ravaged so that, if they ever did have safe specialty health services, well they don't anymore.
...so far so good, right? The DoD is doing an awesome job preventing abortion -- hell, they've made it practically impossible!

(4) engages in under-the-table discrimination against pregnant soldiers and, now, outright criminalizes pregnancy.

So now what? Well, like I said, now you take your life into your hands, nearly kick the bucket, get refused emergency care from your own doctor, get told you're crazy by another doctor and also lose your job. It's that or jail (or maybe both). You don't have much choice.


This blog is primarily for us to share from our perspective in the field, so you might wonder if now I've accidentally digressed into extrapolation or punditry. But I could tell you a surprising (to me) number of stories from work involving women in the military, or married into the military, needing an abortion as a result of their connection to the military and then having a hard time obtaining one as a result of their connection to the military. They're not all the same situation as that of "Amy" in the RD interview -- there's a lot of different ways to get screwed over for serving one's country while uterused. Maybe this will be a two-part post, so next time (around the new year) I can share some of those with you. But you don't need to hear them all to see there's an unjust price for being a woman in uniform.

Late Sunday coathanger amendment reading

Sorry we didn't have a full post for you today...Silky Laminaria's off on some exciting travels and we didn't plan a sub for her!  I'll be back tomorrow for my own blogging day, but in the meantime head over to Angry Black Bitch, who reminds us that a majority of our elected representatives are trying to back us into politely requesting that our rights not be trampled upon if that wouldn't inconvenience everyone too much please. Is that all that Reproductive Justice is?

When was Evolution born?

There are a few things for you to know about our clinic so you will be prepared on the day of your appointment.

#1 Please expect to spend anywhere from one to eight hours at our facility. We will escort you through the preliminary, medical, and recovery processes as safely and respectfully as possible, but you are seeking a deeply stigmatized procedure, and we must slay dragons on your behalf.

#2 We do not accept checks or cash. Please be prepared to pay for your services with a money order, debit or credit card. We understand that this complicates a majority of real-life scenarios, but when we accept cash, everybody pays with cash, and then someone who probably waited too long (because *we forgot to inform* them of #1) will eventually rob us.

#3 Please bring paperwork (variable by state and patient background), and prepare to answer several questions openly and honestly. We are here to help you and will support your health care needs with concentrated medical expertise and painstaking confidentiality.

#4 There will be protestors but please understand that they terminate pregnancies too.

#5 Please bring no more than one support person. We respect your desire to be involved with family and friends throughout your experience, and we understand the limits and obligations of parenting, but the surgery you seek is common, and we simply cannot comfortably and privately accommodate the soul-group of every human-being.

#6 We ask that you not bring children into this facility. We know there are other parts of the world where both intentionally pregnant and unwantedly (sic) pregnant women gather in practice together, and the world will progress, but here we revert to 1 through 5 and repeat: We cannot accommodate children.

#7 Lucky charm

#8 Please allow me to provide directions for traveling to, entering, and exiting our clinic...(variable by clinic and terrorist actvity).

#9 Are you still there?