Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The Sunny Side

When I was in the fifth grade, our class read (and was forced to memorize) The Optimist's Creed. Here it is:

Promise yourself:

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind;

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet;

To make all your friends feel that there is something good in them;

To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true;

To think only the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best;

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own;

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future;

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile;

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others;

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear; and too happy to permit the presence of trouble;

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words, but in great deeds;

To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

I always thought this was nice and appropriate for a 10-year-old. Get your introspection on and enjoy your last year of life without feeling sorry for yourself all the time. But can you guess my favorite part? I'll make it real obvious for you:

"To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others"

Just throwing it out there for all our picture-perfect anti readers to chew on.

You know what? Maybe some holy being will someday come down to Earth to reveal the truths of the universe to all humans. And maybe that truth will be that, indeed, abortion is a terrible, horrible thing that has angered him or her to the point that s/he could not sit back and watch anymore. And maybe all us Abortioneers are going to fry for eternity.




Ours. Not yours.

So, you can continue as usual, protesting and mocking us and shouting hellfire and brimstone from your pedestals until your god finally arrives to prove you right, and you can jump up and down pointing fingers with your "TOLD YA!"s and look like complete A-holes in front of your god, such that he banishes you to the depths right along with us for judging and for not loving thy neighbor and doing unto others and the Abortioneers have the last laugh.

Or, you can just go about your day, being the best person you can possibly be, perhaps by helping families without enough resources to adequately care for their children (hint hint), praying for your own salvation and nodding hello to the Abortioneers as you simply pass by because you're too busy minding your own damn business, and when the rapture happens your god will be so impressed by your meekness that you shall inherit the earth and do whatever the hell you want.

Just sayin'.

It's funny. Last week at the clinic a protester started, as they all inevitably do, to speak Spanish to a tan woman. She clearly didn't understand, either because she didn't speak Spanish or because this boorish oaf's Spanish was dreadful beyond recognition. A fellow escort asked him why he was trying to speak Spanish to her. His reply: "What do you care what I do?"


1 comment:

  1. Hey I just discovered your blog and I absolutely love it! Can't wait to read more :)


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